World Signs

These are GENUINE signs from around the world demonstrating the lack

of understanding of English language and phrases in some places!

Doctor's office, Rome:

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Hotel, Acapulco:

THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED

HERE.

Hotel, Yugoslavia:

THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF

THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel notice, Tokyo:

IS FORBIDDEN TO STEAL HOTEL TOWELS PLEASE. IF YOU ARE NOT

A PERSON TO DO SUCH A THING IS PLEASE NOT TO READ NOTIS.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:

OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

Hotel room notice, Chiang-Mai, Thailand:

PLEASE DO NOT BRING SOLICITORS INTO YOUR ROOM.

Hotel brochure, Italy:

THIS HOTEL IS RENOWNED FOR ITS PEACE AND SOLITUDE. IN

FACT, CROWDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD FLOCK HERE TO

ENJOY ITS SOLITUDE.

Hotel lobby, Bucharest:

THE LIFT IS BEING FIXED FOR THE NEXT DAY. DURING THAT TIME

WE REGRET THAT YOU WILL BE UNBEARABLE.

In a Leipzig lift:

DO NOT ENTER THE LIFT BACKWARDS, AND ONLY WHEN LIT UP.

Hotel elevator, Belgrade:

TO MOVE THE CABIN, PUSH BUTTON FOR WISHING FLOOR. IF THE

CABIN SHOULD ENTER MORE PERSONS, EACH ONE SHOULD PRESS

A NUMBER OF WISHING FLOOR. DRIVING IS THEN GOING

ALPHABETICALLY BY NATIONAL ORDER.

Hotel lift, Paris:

PLEASE LEAVE YOUR VALUES AT THE FRONT DESK.

Hotel, Athens:

VISITORS ARE EXPECTED TO COMPLAIN AT THE OFFICE BETWEEN

THE HOURS OF 9 AND 11 AM DAILY.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox

monastery:

YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS

RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE

BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

Hotel catering to skiers, Austria:

NOT TO PERAMBULATE THE CORRIDORS IN THE HOURS OF REPOSE

IN THE BOOTS OF ASCENSION.

Taken from a menu, Poland:

SALAD A FIRM'S OWN MAKE; LIMPID RED BEET SOUP WITH CHEESY

DUMPLINGS IN THE FORM OF A FINGER; ROASTED DUCK LET LOOSE;

BEEF RASHERS BEATEN UP IN THE COUNTRY PEOPLE'S FASHION.

Supermarket, Hong Kong:

FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT

SELF-SERVICE.

Outside a dress shop, Hong Kong:

LADIES MAY HAVE A FIT UPSTAIRS.

Tailor shop, Rhodes:

ORDER YOUR SUMMERS SUIT. BECAUSE IS BIG RUSH, WE WILL

EXECUTE CUSTOMERS IN STRICT ROTATION.

In an East African newspaper:

A NEW SWIMMING POOL IS RAPIDLY TAKING SHAPE SINCE THE

CONTRACTORS HAVE THROWN IN THE BULK OF THEIR WORKERS.

Hotel, Vienna:

IN CASE OF FIRE, DO YOUR UTMOST TO ALARM THE HOTEL

PORTER.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:

IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE

THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND

WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED

WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:

TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.

From a Russian book on Chess:

A LOT OF WATER HAS BEEN PASSED UNDER THE BRIDGE SINCE THIS

VARIATION HAS BEEN PLAYED.

Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:

TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO

MISCARRIAGES.

In the window on a Swedish furrier:

FUR COATS MADE FOR LADIES FROM THEIR OWN SKIN.

The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:

GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.

Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan:

STOP. DRIVE SIDEWAYS.

In a Swiss mountain inn:

SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM.

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:

WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room:

IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THE USSR, YOU ARE WELCOME

TO IT.

Cocktail lounge, Norway:

LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

At a Budapest zoo:

PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE

FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.

Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan:

COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT JUST CONDITION OF WARM

AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.

Car rental brochure, Tokyo:

WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN.

TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST, BUT IF HE STILL

OBSTACLES YOUR PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOR.